33 Anti-Efficiency Tools Online
June 01, 2009 at 08:06:43 AM, by Blair Mathis
If you're looking at this article, then you are one of us, one of the sick, the demented, the easily amused procrastinators of work and pleasure.
Sure, we could be doing something worthwhile right now--finishing reports or grading papers or looking for that app bug--by why would we, really? There's so many things to do online, things that you can never, ever do in the real world.
Below are thirty-three absolute time-wasters, things that will eat up your time and spit it out like carnivorous animals on a vegetation-only planet.
1: Freaking Huge URL: as if a normal URL wasn't complicated enough, FHURL will take your normal web address and make it huge, freaking huge, or HOLY CRAP long.
2: Get Chirping: its the philosophy of Freaking Huge URL, only backwards...sorta. It makes your URLs really short.
3:Flip Tool: You know all those annoying backwards YouTube comments? This is how they do it.
4: Dickens URL: Again, the same principle as Freaking Huge URL, only instead of making it huge with random letters and numbers, it adds a Dickens quote. Now you appear to be an educated procrastinator.
5: Am I Dumb Test?: This IQ test is a little more honest...it tells you if you're dumb or not.
6: Spirograph: Remember those cool plastic things that would come in kids meals when you were a kid; you'd still a pen in them and twirl and it would create a cool pattern? That is what spirograph is, only the pattern always comes out perfect, unlike those things you did as a kid.
7: Symmetry Lab: This little app gives you four basic mechanical parts, of which you use to create a massive machine of evil genius proportions.
8: Soda Constructor: To quote the website: "Sodaconstructor is a construction kit for interactive creations using masses and springs. By altering physical properties like gravity, friction, and speed, curiously anthropomorphic models can be made to walk, climb, wriggle, jiggle, or collapse into a writhing heap."
9: Popular URLs: If so many other people are reading it that its one of the most popular URLs in its category, there's a good chance you'll want to read it, too. Hence the reason why Pop URLs is such an incredible waste of time.
10: Hot Or Not: Do you have no life? If not, then give others the validation they need from complete strangers on the Internet by voting for whose Hot, and whose Not.
11: Canine Clash: So you like the time wasting idea of Hot or Not, but don't want to keep looking at pictures of people that you think are equally unhot? Then try Canine Clash! This website lets you vote on which dog is the best in its category.
12: LeekSpin: That's right, just keep staring.
13: Google Earth Coordinates: Look up alllllll of the coordinates in this article on Google Earth.
14: Best of Craigslist: Best of Craigslist is just what it says...a compilation of hilarious posts that are found on Craigslist.
15:Subservient Chicken: Burger King has found one of the ultimate ways for one to waste time: the subservient chicken. Simply type in a command, and the chicken will do it (within reason).
16: Ask 500 People: This website is so addictive! Instead of those boring poll websites, Ask 500 People will show you a geographic map in real time of all the answers. As of five seconds ago, someone in Indonesia doesn't believe in ghosts.
17: Whack Your Boss: Are you sitting at work right now, reading this, miserable, wishing your boss would fall in a hole? If so, take your frustration out online, with this addictive game called Whack Your boss.
18: The Customer is Not Always Right: If you've ever worked retail, this website will probably just bring back some bad memories. If you're like me, however, you'll find it so hilarious that hours pass unnoticed.
19: Guess the Google: In this complete waste of time, you are presented with 25 partial images that all resulted from the same Google, and you have to guess what that was. You have merely a few seconds to get it right.
20: String Spin: Basically, you just drop some lines on a spinning circle, then tell it to spin your lines, and it creates an awesome picture from your crap.
21: You Are A: Four words spinning to annoying circus music tell you who you are and what you like.
22: Watching Grass Grow: Literally.
23: Watch it Shred: This is similar to Will it Blend, only there are more videos, its of things being shredded.
24: Will it Blend?: Bah! Here's Will it Blend, too.
25: Watch it Dry: Still not good enough? Then here, watch paint dry.
26: Etch-a-Sketch: You've probably had an Etch-a-Sketch in your lifetime. Now, you can use it in wonderful virtual 2D glory.
27: Virtual Toilet Paper: Unroll the entire thing. Go ahead, do it!
28: Jello Time!: Poke the Jello and listen to it twang. Not quite like Santa's belly.
29: Musical Balls: Not that kind, you perv!
30: Create Your Own Superhero: This cool website lets you create your own superhero. When you're done, trying dressing like it; I'm sure all your cube mates will think you're cool.
31: Tossing Cards: Toss a deck of cards into a top hat. Best you can't get all of them.
32: URL-a-Dex: Waste your time buying and selling imaginary stocks for websites with money that isn't real.
33: Waste Time Tracking How Much Time You Waste: Here are steps to track how much time you waste online. Sounds like a waste of time, eh?
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